LISTEN!
RELATIONSHIP SANITY: Creating and Maintaining Healthy Relationships (a Central Recovery Press paperback, on sale October 23, 2018) on for an interview. In this follow-up to their well-received title, Irrelationship - psychoanalyst Mark Borg, psychiatrist Grant Brenner, and registered nurse Daniel Berry draw on their extensive clinical research and experience to show how we use our relationships to hide from intimacy and how our childhood caretakers’ inability to address their own emotional needs impacts our adult relationships. Offering accessible assessment tools to help identify damaging habits, this team of experts provides readers with a step-by-step guide to help us embrace vulnerability and properly nurture and commit to the relationships we value.
About RELATIONSHIP SANITY:
Most of us want to be in loving, honest, open-hearted relationships, but few of us are aware that we may also be afraid of intimacy. If we grew up in less-than-perfect families, then we likely internalized a way of dealing with loved ones that prevents us from embracing the intimate relationships and meaningful connections that we so desperately crave. As a result, many of us are trapped in dysfunctional relationships, not just with significant others, but also with family members, coworkers, and friends.
In RELATIONSHIP SANITY: Creating and Maintaining Healthy Relationships (a Central Recovery Press paperback, on sale October 23, 2018) - the follow-up to their bestselling title, Irrelationship - psychoanalyst Mark Borg, psychiatrist Grant Brenner, and registered nurse Daniel Berry draw on their extensive clinical research and experience to illuminate the underlying issues that prevent us from entering into authentic relationships. Offering accessible assessment tools to help identify damaging habits, this team of experts provides readers with a step-by-step guide to help them develop compassionate empathy, embrace vulnerability, and commit to an ongoing nurturing of the relationships they value.
Drawing on relatable case studies of those who addressed their dysfunctional, toxic, or estranged relationships, Borg, Brenner, and Berry show readers how to approach common relationship hurdles by using:
1. The 40-20-40. This tool creates a safe space for partners to interact by creating a middle ground (20 percent) for negotiating issues created by differences they bring to the table from their respective (40 percent).
2. GRAFTS Assessment. Partners learn which role they have taken on since childhood (Good, Right, Absent, Funny, Tense, Smart). Identifying roles empowers us to take responsibility for damaging behaviors that we contribute to the relationship.
3. Compassionate Empathy. This tool teaches self-acceptance and open-hearted listening so that partners can name and own each other’s needs and desires.
4. The Dream Sequence. Standing for Discovery, Repair, Empowerment, Alternatives, and Mutuality, this proven step-by-step process helps partners learn how to create safe, intimate relationships despite feelings of vulnerability.
Utilizing quizzes, exercises, and assessment charts, RELATIONSHIP SANITY enables readers to ascertain and counteract the detrimental, ingrained behaviors that negatively impact adult relationships. Perfect for those who have become lonely in their relationships, as well as for those who are trapped in toxic exchanges, this essential guide offers invaluable tools for anyone seeking healthier connections with their partners, loved ones, and colleagues.
RELATIONSHIP SANITY: Creating and Maintaining Healthy Relationships (a Central Recovery Press paperback, on sale October 23, 2018) on for an interview. In this follow-up to their well-received title, Irrelationship - psychoanalyst Mark Borg, psychiatrist Grant Brenner, and registered nurse Daniel Berry draw on their extensive clinical research and experience to show how we use our relationships to hide from intimacy and how our childhood caretakers’ inability to address their own emotional needs impacts our adult relationships. Offering accessible assessment tools to help identify damaging habits, this team of experts provides readers with a step-by-step guide to help us embrace vulnerability and properly nurture and commit to the relationships we value.
About RELATIONSHIP SANITY:
Most of us want to be in loving, honest, open-hearted relationships, but few of us are aware that we may also be afraid of intimacy. If we grew up in less-than-perfect families, then we likely internalized a way of dealing with loved ones that prevents us from embracing the intimate relationships and meaningful connections that we so desperately crave. As a result, many of us are trapped in dysfunctional relationships, not just with significant others, but also with family members, coworkers, and friends.
In RELATIONSHIP SANITY: Creating and Maintaining Healthy Relationships (a Central Recovery Press paperback, on sale October 23, 2018) - the follow-up to their bestselling title, Irrelationship - psychoanalyst Mark Borg, psychiatrist Grant Brenner, and registered nurse Daniel Berry draw on their extensive clinical research and experience to illuminate the underlying issues that prevent us from entering into authentic relationships. Offering accessible assessment tools to help identify damaging habits, this team of experts provides readers with a step-by-step guide to help them develop compassionate empathy, embrace vulnerability, and commit to an ongoing nurturing of the relationships they value.
Drawing on relatable case studies of those who addressed their dysfunctional, toxic, or estranged relationships, Borg, Brenner, and Berry show readers how to approach common relationship hurdles by using:
1. The 40-20-40. This tool creates a safe space for partners to interact by creating a middle ground (20 percent) for negotiating issues created by differences they bring to the table from their respective (40 percent).
2. GRAFTS Assessment. Partners learn which role they have taken on since childhood (Good, Right, Absent, Funny, Tense, Smart). Identifying roles empowers us to take responsibility for damaging behaviors that we contribute to the relationship.
3. Compassionate Empathy. This tool teaches self-acceptance and open-hearted listening so that partners can name and own each other’s needs and desires.
4. The Dream Sequence. Standing for Discovery, Repair, Empowerment, Alternatives, and Mutuality, this proven step-by-step process helps partners learn how to create safe, intimate relationships despite feelings of vulnerability.
Utilizing quizzes, exercises, and assessment charts, RELATIONSHIP SANITY enables readers to ascertain and counteract the detrimental, ingrained behaviors that negatively impact adult relationships. Perfect for those who have become lonely in their relationships, as well as for those who are trapped in toxic exchanges, this essential guide offers invaluable tools for anyone seeking healthier connections with their partners, loved ones, and colleagues.
ABOUT
People in resilient relationships are co-owners, experience reciprocity, and are better prepared to meet challenges authentically and effectively. In this sequel to the best-selling Irrelationship, the authors use examples from their clinical practice to review the concept of irrelationship and expand the DREAM Sequence, a tool used by affected couples to address perennial relationship issues.
By mutually and mindfully viewing the relationship as a third entity, separate from each individual, couples will learn how to live in and with the ambiguity of empathy, intimacy, vulnerability, and emotional investment and view relationship sanity as a deliberate and joyful undertaking to maintain and deepen connection.
People in resilient relationships are co-owners, experience reciprocity, and are better prepared to meet challenges authentically and effectively. In this sequel to the best-selling Irrelationship, the authors use examples from their clinical practice to review the concept of irrelationship and expand the DREAM Sequence, a tool used by affected couples to address perennial relationship issues.
By mutually and mindfully viewing the relationship as a third entity, separate from each individual, couples will learn how to live in and with the ambiguity of empathy, intimacy, vulnerability, and emotional investment and view relationship sanity as a deliberate and joyful undertaking to maintain and deepen connection.
About the Authors:
Mark B. Borg, Jr., Ph.D. is a community and clinical psychologist and a psychoanalyst practicing in New York City. He is founding partner of The Community Consulting Group, a consulting firm that trains community stakeholders, local governments and other organizations to use psychoanalytic techniques in community rebuilding and revitalization. He is a supervisor of psychotherapy at the William Alanson White Institute and has written extensively about the intersection of psychoanalysis and community crisis intervention. He has published numerous articles and book chapters on community intervention, organizational consultation, psychoanalytic therapy; and on the application of psychoanalytic theory and technique to improve and streamline the process of community crisis intervention.
Grant H. Brenner, MD is a psychiatrist in private practice in New York City, specializing in treating mood and anxiety disorders and the complex problems arising from developmental childhood trauma. He works from a humanistic and integrative perspective, incorporating evidence-based approaches as well as innovative techniques such as transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS) and neurofeedback. He is on the faculty of the Mount Sinai Beth Israel Hospital, Director of Trauma Service at the William Alanson White Institute and a volunteer and Board member of the not-for-profit Disaster Psychiatry Outreach. He is an author and editor of the book Creating Spiritual and Psychological Resilience: Integrating Care in Disaster Relief Work, and has published a number of book chapters and papers.
Daniel Berry, RN, MHA has practiced as a Registered Nurse in New York City since 1987. Working in in-patient, home care and community settings, his work has taken him into some of the city’s most privileged households as well as some of its most underserved and dangerous public housing projects in Manhattan and the South Bronx. He is currently Assistant Director of Nursing for Risk Management at a public facility serving homeless and undocumented victims of street violence, addiction and traumatic injuries. In 2015 he was invited to serve as a nurse consultant to a United Nations-certified NGO in Afghanistan that promotes community development and addresses women’s and children’s health issues.
